Oswald Chambers 

 
The Spirit Himself bears witness with our spirit . . . —Romans 8:16

We are in danger of getting into a bargaining spirit with God when we come to Him—we want the witness of the Spirit before we have done what God tells us to do.
Why doesn’t God reveal Himself to you? He cannot. It is not that He will not, but He cannot, because you are in the way as long as you won’t abandon yourself to Him in total surrender. Yet once you do, immediately God witnesses to Himself—He cannot witness to you, but He instantly witnesses to His own nature in you. If you received the witness of the Spirit before the reality and truth that comes from obedience, it would simply result in sentimental emotion. But when you act on the basis of redemption, and stop the disrespectfulness of debating with God, He immediately gives His witness. As soon as you abandon your own reasoning and arguing, God witnesses to what He has done, and you are amazed at your total disrespect in having kept Him waiting. If you are debating as to whether or not God can deliver from sin, then either let Him do it or tell Him that He cannot. Do not quote this or that person to Him. Simply obey Matthew 11:28 , “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden . . . .” Come, if you are weary, and ask, if you know you are evil (see Luke 11:9-13).
The Spirit of God witnesses to the redemption of our Lord, and to nothing else. He cannot witness to our reason. We are inclined to mistake the simplicity that comes from our natural commonsense decisions for the witness of the Spirit, but the Spirit witnesses only to His own nature, and to the work of redemption, never to our reason. If we are trying to make Him witness to our reason, it is no wonder that we are in darkness and uncertainty. Throw it all overboard, trust in Him, and He will give you the witness of the Spirit.

Bible in One Year: Isaiah

Vulnerability!

There is this video that has been really popular lately on TED.com by Brene' Brown If you haven't seen it yet you should! It's only 20 minutes and for me it was quite compelling... I was drawn in and couldn't let it go.

My husband and I meet every week with a few couples (one couple not yet married) with the intentionality to keep ourselves accountable. Not just to keep each other accountable but also to practice accountability before God.  I was sharing with them this video about vulnerability and the importance of understanding shame. As we went around the room each of us shared about our week. The couple that is not yet married said they had a good week etc. and as things rambled along Josh brought up how proud he was that he spent one whole hour each week with Savannah, just focused on their relationship and connecting with each other.   Savannah quickly informed him, however, even though this was good - how much time did he spend on pointless stuff like video games, sports and so on. We all smiled and his bubble was summarily popped. We did, however, give him great encouragement because we all knew we had not done much better in our previous week. 

We all know that the task at hand is a big one, and is not for the faint of heart. What really got me thinking from the video is that the vulnerability/shame exercise is excruciating for everyone and keeps us all resistant from exploring our relationships deeper, all because of fear of rejection. Hence: the one hour a week is all I can muster for now.

I believe this is the hidden key, especially for me, to a woman's heart. It's not just him listening and hearing my heart but it's allowing me in to see and understand his deep root of shame - him being vulnerable enough to share it, to understand it - and thus feeling the profound sense of connection. That is what I want most of all. I think this is where our souls meet with the whole heart and where we can truly become "soul mates." Or is that the "oneness" God describes in marriage and the "oneness" He wants to share with us?  When we let go of the distraction of excruciation/rejection and allow ourselves to understand our own shame, and share it with each other; in response our souls begin to knit together.